Can Crazy Be Loved

I’ve never really seen myself being in a relationship, I’ve never classed anyone I’ve been with as a ‘partner’ before, people see me as vulnerable an innocent, therefore they can take advantage of me, anyone I’ve come in contact with become obsessive an controlling, it must be something I do

I can get very possessive, an jealous myself, perhaps because I’ve been hurt so many times by people I’ve been close too, an I guess I do have unresolved abandonment issues

I can seem to be a bundle of confusion to people, an my social phobia never makes it easy to meet someone new, the baggage I come with like when they see who I really am

The whole time i get the repetitive voices inside, ‘you’re not good enough for them, they could do better than you’ ‘you’ll just end up being hurt again’

I think every time I’ve been hurt, my guard goes up, my heart closes down, an a wall of protection is build even higher to climb

I’ve met a couple of people who seemed perfect for me, but because of how I am, I ended up ruining things for myself, I just couldn’t give anymore of myself, I just couldn’t let go

Perhaps in time, I’ll heal, an finally open up to someone, with how I am now, I think starting a relationship would be selfish of me, for the other person

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